What is love? 

Many times, when we hear the word “love”, we think of perfectly plump red hearts. And during the weeks leading to Valentine’s Day, we associate love with red roses, chocolate-covered strawberries… perhaps a fancy dinner somewhere. Children expect to exchange “Valentines” and hope to find a piece of candy attached to it. However, we know that love goes beyond the commercial value given to it during Valentine’s Day. 

Another image that comes to mind when we think of love is a couple strolling in a park on a perfect spring day, holding hands, whispering conversations and showing affection to each other. And then, if we ponder about love further, we might come up with a couple getting married, the bride happily throwing her bouquet to a group of eager women. A father playing ball with his son or teaching his daughter how to ride a bike. A mother brushing her daughter’s hair. A child tenderly hugging a beloved pet. 

But we are humans. 

And humans are not perfect.

Human love is not perfect.

The most loving marriage can turn. Unfortunately, many marriages today end in divorce. And that child whom we tended to so devotedly during all those years and who told us “I love you” so many times before bedtime? That child might grow into a teenager who turns away from parents, some might even become estranged adults. These are extreme examples, of course. But between perfect -or rather “very good”, for we will not see perfection while on this Earth- and terrible life circumstances, there is a wide range of not so ideal and highly stressful situations that we will, undoubtfully, find ourselves in. 

So then, is there “perfect love”?

Yes! Look at this Bible verse:

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love [emphasis added] casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.” 

1 John 4:18 ESV

“Perfect love casts out fear.” The Bible not only tells us that there is perfect love, but it tells us it drives out/expels fear! 

Wow!

What does this verse mean to you? 

I had read this verse many times, never stopping to contemplate its meaning. I had also heard it tossed in conversations at church and even in dialogue in Christian fiction. But a couple of weeks ago, as I was writing a blurb for a novella I’m working on, this verse popped into my mind. So, I went back to my Bible to read it in context. 

As I read, I noticed quite a few interesting points leading to 1John 4:18.

• God shows His love to us in that He sent His Son to the world (1 John 4:9)
• He sent His Son into the world so that we live through Him (1 John 4:9)
• He sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins! (1 John 4:10)
• We must also love one another (1 John 4:12)
• Loving one another shows God’s presence in our lives (1 John 4:12)

So, this perfect love of God toward us has a lot to do with His Son, Jesus…

As David Guzic explains in his online Bible commentary Enduringword.com, “The completeness of love means we do not cower in fear before God, dreading His judgment, either now or in the day of judgment. We know all the judgment we ever deserved–past, present, and future–was poured out on Jesus Christ on the cross.” ¹   

The punishment we deserve was put on Jesus. 

That is perfect love. 

A perfect God who gave His perfect Son as a sacrificial lamb to pay for our sins so that we may be called His children and enjoy a relationship with Him forever (John 3:16, Romans 8:17, Revelations 21).

What does 1 John 4:18 look like in everyday life?

I asked some of my friends from church what this Bible verse means to them and got very insightful answers. They gave me permission to share with you. I pray their words be an encouragement for you today. 

“My life is in His hands, and I can be confident in His perfect love for me and His plan for my life.” Confidence. No fear because she knows her life is in the hands of a perfect God. 

“When something difficult comes my way, I have to rest in the truth that God loves me and knows what is best. When I do this, I can give it to Him and be at peace (not that it is easy or that I always do this)” I like her frankness when she admitted she does not always rest in God’s truth. We all doubt. None of us has perfect faith; but when we learn to trust in Him, we also trust that He will forgive us when we confess our unbelief.

“I have to bring my fear to Him… after I recognize it.” To me, the most valuable words here were “after I recognize it”. Sometimes fear roots in us and becomes part of who we are. We might mask it with anger, or might get anxious easily, or sad, but when we dig to find the root, we can lay that problem at God’s feet. This is, in my experience, the first step toward emotional healing. 

“My faith and trust in God allow me to not be fearful. I trust He is with me and will take care of things.” AMEN! 

Here is another answer: 

“The whole verse says, ‘There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. The one who fears has not been perfected in love.’ Many people are afraid to approach God because of their sin. They think they are beyond the reach of God’s love, and they fear punishment. If someone is afraid of God, even if they say they are a Christian, they have not come to know who he really is. Going beyond receiving God’s love and then loving others (which is really God’s will for us), I am reminded of the song ‘I Am Loved’ by Bill Gaither. It says, ‘I can risk loving you, for the One who knows me best loves me most.’ People will inevitably fail us, but the love of God makes forgiveness and reconciliation possible. This is how my husband and I have stayed married for 30 years!” What a beautiful testimony of how trust in God’s perfect love that only comes from a relationship with Jesus Christ has glued this marriage together in such a remarkable way! 

Do you notice the pattern in their answers? When our circumstances are difficult, we have confidence in the One in whose hands our lives rest. 

Jesus, the perfect love of the Father. Do you know Him? 

Would you like to know Him? 

And if you know Him, how do you apply this verse to your life? Join in the conversation by leaving a comment in the section below. 

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1. Guzic, David. “1 John Chapter 4.” Enduring Word, 28 Oct. 2021, https://enduringword.com/bible-commentary/1-john-4/.